It’s funny how life always seems to hit us with a series of events, sometimes good, sometimes bad, but they just keep on coming. We end up thinking, “Is this ever going to end?” even though deep down inside we know it isn’t. People respond to these incidents in different ways, and it’s important to keep in mind that the way we respond to things can either make ‘life’ easier or harder, acceptable or unbearable.

Looking at people, you always find them ‘thanking God’ when something good happens in their life. On the other hand, when something bad happens they either end up blaming Him or cursing themselves or their luck. Why isn’t possible for us to enjoy what’s sweet while we can, and thank God for the sour because whether we know it or not it makes us stronger and better people if we ‘respond’ to it in the right way.

What breaks my heart is to see people throwing their lives away as a response to a tragedy that took place in their lives or a dark tunnel that they don’t know how to get out of. There’s always a light at the end its just a matter of:

1. How do you get there?

2. By what means do you get there?

3. How badly you want to get there?

Once we realize this we stop reacting in a way that hurts others and ourselves and send out more of a positive reaction that will leave us feeling positive and leave the people around us feeling inspired.

I’ve come to the conclusion that the reason why we react they way we do is because as soon as we get hit, beaten down and fall, we ask the ultimate question “WHY?” Why did this happen to me? Why do I have to go through this? Why can’t the good outlast the bad? Why can’t life hand me a chocolate sundae with hot fudge and sprinkles instead of constantly throwing lemons at me? The reality of the situation is: you will never find the answer. You can come up with theories of why it might have happened but you will never really know why.

If we had all the answers to life’s’ questions then what’s the point of life itself? Would the words ‘faith’, ‘hope’, ‘wish’, or ‘dream’, hold the same meaning? Contemplate on that.

Note to readers: This article contains facts, my point of view and opinions

Can we really say that men are the superior sex? That they will always be dominant over women? That they are granted more rights? In my opinion, yes men are the superior sex and they will always be. If you ask me why I’d say that there are many factors and reasons and one of the main causes would be ‘Ego’. Lets go back to where it all began.

According to some writers, women have been discriminated they had no freedom, no rights; in the Arab world. Back in the pre-Islamic era women had no consent in marriage. They were sold to the highest bidder and had no properties, no inheritances, and no rights whatsoever. This included health, education, wealth and even justice. At that time the husband had the power to terminate the marriage whenever he chose, leaving his wife with nothing. If the marriage went on and she somehow bore him a daughter, the newly born baby was to be buried alive. Basically, at that time, women were slaves, they were something a man would inherit, and they were a treated as a product or a service. The abuse that they went through is one we would see nowadays as barbaric. They were raped, beaten up and sometimes even killed.

Personally, when I try to imagine what it was like back in those days, I don’t have the heart to. The prejudice done, the lives that were taken, there is no excuse to justify their actions or their way of thinking. How women were regarded as stupid and ignorant, which denied them the privileges of knowledge. How they were tools used to please men or deliver them boys. Can you imagine the brutality? Can you put yourselves in their shoes? What would you do? Exactly.

Going on to the time of the Prophet Mohammed, the time of Islam. Islam changed everything; it brought light to such a dark world. The Prophet (pbuh) told them that the religion rejected criminal injustice. The Prophet warned them against the burial of their daughters and the act of mistreating them. He stood alongside women at a time where everyone stood against them. He gave them what they were longing for, normal lives, and rights resulting in security. He forbid the act of sex-selected abortions and acknowledged women for who they are. He gave them freedom in education, in work; their health was now in their own hands, he gave them the freedom to live.

When this change happened, women took advantage of it. They played different roles. They drove their husbands to become leaders and helped them with the process and major decisions; they were no longer looked upon as stupid. And so goes the saying “Behind every great man, there’s a great women.” Islam preached equality. As time passed by, they were allowed to travel, they had economic roles and they had a right to vote. So if women had all these rights where does it go wrong?

Allow me to start by telling you about my society and finish with my opinion. Well I live in one of the countries in the Middle East, and going about 80 years back, we didn’t have this country. Families were separated in tribes and most of the men were religious extremists so the women had to obey a man’s words. They didn’t have an education although they had the right to. Men traveled to gather knowledge and left the women behind to take care of the children. They couldn’t work, they couldn’t go out, and their actions were very limited. Women who would go against this were singled out. They were deemed the black sheep. Now, although the country has developed, society hasn’t. Some families have no limits; they give their offspring the freedom of the world. While others have all the limits and regard freedom as the devil.

I myself was brought up in a family of both. Even though my father was a very open minded man, society diminished the freedom he was capable of giving me. The point is we live in a world of inequality and here I mean the Arab world. I’m not saying that everyone should be free to do whatever they want to do, what I’m saying is that as humans we are equal. We are capable of doing anything a man can do, but why are we always treated as if we were disabled? If a man sins in this society, it’s ok, he’s a man! If a woman sins, it’s the biggest mistake of her life and she will lose her place in society.

It’s hard to understand the way people in this flawed Arab world think. It’s flawed because it’s ignorant, but it’s beautiful in so many other ways. Getting back to the point, is it fair? No. Should we accept it? No. There should be less discrimination and more equality. There should be more respect. Our sex is not weak. Answering the question if men are the superior sex? Neither of us is. We are equal. So stand up for yourselves and make a difference, bring a change.

  “I AM A WOMAN!”

The concept of the ‘glass slipper’ is a familiar one. We all grew up to Walt Disney, and it left its mark on most of us. We learnt that we shouldn’t lie by watching Pinocchio, also that we shouldn’t talk to strangers by Snow White and that love is blind by Beauty and the Beast.

Every story in the children books we used to read, or the movies we used to watch delivered a certain message that we have implanted in our subconscious mind. The reason why I chose to speak about Cinderella is because it was the one I loved most.

Cinderella was the story I could relate to most, as I’m sure a lot of women can too. Abused, mistreated and under appreciated, but at the end of the day, a prince on a white horse whisks her away and they live ‘happily ever after’. That’s what we grew up to believe; that one day our own special prince will find us and carry us away to ‘lala land’ where everything is hunky dory.

What the story failed to tell is was that along with love come pain, hurt, heartache and a hole that’s left in your heart and that men nowadays aren’t what you’d call ‘Prince Charming’. It wasn’t just the stories that mislead us; it was our upbringing along with our innocent inability to know what fiction and reality are and the difference between them. Our parents failed to inform us and we grew up believing in a fictional notion that love is forever and has no boundaries. What they also failed to do as Muslims was seed our religion into us so we could follow the light instead of walking blindly in the dark.

Now comes the question, is it our fault? Can we really be blamed for pursuing love and looking for forever? For having such a deep desire to have that glass slipper fit? My answer is no, it’s not our fault at all. We didn’t know what we know now and what we should’ve known then. We didn’t know that ‘Prince Charming’ would leave us with a broken heart. We didn’t know what our religion begged us to know. Now we pay the price for a mistake that wasn’t ours.

The message I’d like to send to women all over the world is a direct and clear one. Those who still have that child in them who believes in the idea of love like I do. “It’s not about having the right foot to fit the right shoe. It’s not living in a real pessimistic world either. That inner child doesn’t have to die. That inner child needs to hope; it needs to wish and dream of brighter tomorrows. We just have to teach ourselves how to do it the right way. Here’s when you ask me how? A dear friend of mine once told me “Believe.” And that’s exactly what I’m going to tell you. Don’t believe in love. Believe in Allah. Believe that Allah has the ability to turn your fantasy into reality so hold on to that with both hands and never give up. In a world of lies and deceit and negativity, all we need is faith and faith will take us to the highest mountains and deepest oceans, maybe even to the land where ‘Prince Charming’ awaits us, just around the corner.”